There comes a time, when we have to be honest with ourselves about how much we really take from our parents. I mean, let’s get real right now… our parents are our FIRST teachers. Therefore, there are many things that we learn from them.
Not only our physical characteristics, but we take on their ways of dealing with things and processing things as well. That’s why it’s so important that we watch what’s done in front of the children at all times.
They are watching, they can hear you, they will mimic what they SEE and HEAR!
I think that sometimes, we as adults, really forget that some ways, patterns, and behaviors that we learned from our parents were very toxic. Sometimes, it’s okay to re-learn the correct ways to receive love that works for you or cope with stress or a healthier way to function in a relationship.
As time changes, we are learning as a society, community, and as a people, that the same things that worked for our parents, will not necessarily work for us. That’s b/c the world is changing.
Technology is a bigger focus. People are redefining themselves. Social media is a huge factor in business, personal, and life in general. Careers are being redesigned and redefined. The degree, marriage, and picket fence aren’t dreams anymore. There’s more to life than just that!
Times are changing. So, redefine yourself with healthy habits, behaviors, and coping strategies. Then, readjust with it! ❤
#MessageMonday
I know my parents weren’t perfect but I didn’t DIE. They did the best they could based on how they were raised and for me that is enough. Despite how much the culture is changing, I am grateful for my parents and the lessons I learned from them. As with all things, including the lessons we learned from our elders, you eat the meat and spit out the bones. The habits and behaviors that are not effective, dismiss. Those that are beneficial, we repeat.
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I respect this viewpoint. Of course, the lessons we learn from our parents make us who we are and that’s something that we will always hold near and dear, however, the culture is changing! It’s changing and those old ideals and lessons may or may not work anymore. Altho, there’s nothing new under the sun, we still have to adapt. Much respect tho.
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This is so true. Realizing and accepting the qualities I possess from my parents was a huge growth point in my self awareness journey.
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Exactly. Sometimes, we don’t realize that our own qualities are toxic, not b/c they came from our parents, but b/c they were picked up from our environment and social interactions as well. It’s all connected. The important part is that we have to be aware and be willing to heal, so that we don’t pass them down to our offspring. Thanks for the comment. 🙂
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My parents are boomers and we are millennials, it’s so different now. My mom is more conservative and I’m more open minded. Its not a bad thing but, when u have children i want them to be able to fully express themselves. I feel like I didn’t really get that chance until I became older.
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I definitely feel you on this! I want to raise my children COMPLETELY different than I was raised b/c I know that the way I want to raise my children can be done. For example, I don’t want my children to go to public schools. Back in the 80s, there was nothing but public schools, private schools, and boarding schools. So, you’re right. Things are changing and as parents or parents to be, we have to be able to change with it to ensure that we give our children the best lives possible. Thanks for the comment. 🙂
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Great post and very insightful we have to watch our behavior
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Agreed. Children watch everything and normalize the behaviors they see and language they hear. They are sponges. We must be careful. Thanks for the comment! 🙂
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I see so much of my mother ways in me and I work so hard daily to correct those bad habits. I don’t blame her because she taught me based off of what she knew but the chain breaks here. I refuse to pass down some of the toxic behavior. Reading this in a weird way was confirmation. Great article!
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Yes! Yes! Yes! I hear you, loud and clear. Toxic behaviors must be stopped and must be changed. If not, it just continues on and on. Let’s face it… our children and grandchildren don’t deserve to carry generational burdens b/c we were too proud to heal from the ones we were carrying! Okay! It stops here. Glad it was helpful! Thanks for the comment! 🙂
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Yesss girl I love this post! You are so right I don’t raise my daughters the same way my mother raised me we are raising our children in a new age and yes times are changing and the world is constantly evolving so we must grow with it. I try to be the best role model for my kids and prepare them for this world. But I also have great visible respect for their individuality, desires and personal beliefs.
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I love it. I love it. Things ain’t the same anymore. It calls for us to be different and adopt different ways as well. There’s nothing wrong with learning as you go. That’s life in general. Nobody has all the answers. Keep GROWING! 🙂
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