In the wake of the Bill Cosby being sentenced to 3-10 years in prison for drugging and raping women for decades, there have been countless others that have been called out for some of the same crimes. Some of the men include Harvey Weinstein, Matt Lauer, Russell Simmons, Aziz Ansari, and Nelly.
However, it remains common that many of the men and women that commit sexual assault or rape do not get called out for it and justice is not get served. Many women and men took to Twitter to state their reasons for not reporting the violations and crimes against them.
- Woman: He was a friend of my dad’s and a cop.
- Woman: I was drugged at a party.
- Woman: He told me it was a game. She was 8.
- Woman: Nobody would believe me.
- Woman: He was my best friend.
- Woman: Fear of retaliation.
- Man: He was my father, raping my cousins. Then, he did it to my daughter.
- Woman: He was my boss. I needed my job and I was embarrassed.
We all know how grossly under reported sexual assault and rape is. Many people are shamed because they believe it’s their fault or they deserved it when it’s simply a double standard that men and women are taught as children.
We know that girls are taught that they need to dress a certain way or behave a certain way to not attract “negative attention”, however, in that same vein boys are not told anything. Hell, boys and men can’t even understand that NO means NO and have repeatedly been excused for their overly sexual behavior. Girls are reminded that boys will be boys and they, the girls, should stay in line.
UGH! We know that’s not fair! How does the “boys will be boys” line still apply? How come boys aren’t taught to keep their hands to themselves? Why aren’t they taught as boys to respect women’s right to say NO no matter when she says it? Why do men think they are entitled to a woman’s body just because they went on a date or hung out? Why are they allowed to get away with these things for so long?
Well, the silence of their victims, the shaming of the public, family, and friends for speaking out, and the message they are taught as young boys, is why. No, I am not victim shaming, but the hashtag #WhyIDidntReportIt speaks volumes.
All of these women and men were violated, some of them multiple times, by someone knew and trusted. It’s really a sin and a shame that they have to carry these heavy burdens around with them for so long.
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you. ~Maya Angelou
While I do encourage these women and men to speak up, I ask them to do so when they are ready! I stand with these women and men, to support their rights as a human beings, individuals, men, and women.